Dear Tiggy,
My friend and I are having a dispute and I’m wondering if you can help me out. He says that there’s no real reason to tell my health care provider that I’m bi because I can essentially just be treated as a gay person or a straight person, depending on with whom (or whether) I’m having sex around the time of my visit. I think he’s wrong but I can’t seem to articulate why. Help?
—HMO but not quite H-O-M-O
I think there’s something to be said for coming out as bi whenever possible in order to shrug off this invisibility cloak that we keep finding ourselves under. It would do your health care providers — heck, the world — well to understand just how many bi folks they’re really dealing with every day. But beyond simply making a statement, you should disclose because the health of bi folks is at greater risk in a variety of ways than straights and, believe it or not, lesbians/gays.
Amy Andre and Cheryl Dobinson are two of the most prominent bi health researchers in the world, and their work in the NGLTF’s “Bisexual Health” book is critical to your argument. You don’t have to read the whole thing, just skip to Appendix A for the top ten bisexual health issues. I’m talking about addictive substance use, cancer, depression/anxiety, suicidal ideation, and more. I’ll say it again: we’re statistically worse off than all non-bis. That’s pretty shocking.
Unfortunately, when we’re not out and counted, these facts are hidden. So when researchers like Andre and Dobinson attempt to study bi health, they are strongly urged to research gays and lesbians instead because we bis are considered an insignificant niche. This leads to a lack of bi health information on our community, convincing us that our health issues are the same as gays/lesbians or straights and, thus, we don’t need to identify to our providers. This confirms to research funders that it would be a waste of time supporting bi health projects, and…well, you get the idea. It’s a vicious cycle of bad bi health.
It’s entirely up to you whether you disclose your bisexuality to your doc but I think it could only help, assuming s/he is a professional and provides a safe space. And if the only reason you’re not disclosing is because you think it’ll freak out the medical staff, let me tell you: those people have heard way worse. I mean WAY worse. Rest assured, whatever kind of sex you’re having, you can not gross out a nurse. Believe that.
© 2011 Tiggy Upland. Tiggy Upland reserves the right to use all submitted queries anonymously, in any medium.